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M—Meaningful Mission moves beyond garden variety mission statements to capture the strategic intent of an organization in a manner that harnesses the emotional and intellectual energy of every employee. Meaningful Mission provides the true north on the corporate compass and creates a vision of the value of each employee’s job.
I—Information Intelligence is the ability to assimilate and assemble information to make wise decisions. In a world where tangibles are being replaced by intangibles and the "hard" is surrendering to the soft, transforming information into intelligence becomes the key currency of the new economy.
L—Loyalty Linkages: Organizations are no longer merely competing for customers: they are competing for talented employees. Employee loyalty creates customer loyalty. Smart employers recognize that while an employee’s time can be bought, loyalty must be earned, and have developed effective strategies for employee retention.
L—Learning and Leadership: Effective organizations embrace the vision of creating leadership at every level through continuous learning. Leadership is developed only in those organizations where learning is a way of life. Smart organizations replace the five major learning disabilities with the five critical learning disciplines.
E—Empowered Teams: Disappointment with "empowerment" and "teams" have caused companies to discard these two tired buzzwords and dispose of the principles they represent. Smart companies have embraced the eight requisites for an empowered culture that creates the fertile soil for true teamwork at multiple levels of the organization.
N—Nurturing Environment: A nurturing environment demonstrates the organization’s commitment to and care for the needs, growth and development of their people. Trust, respect, significance, results, challenge and control represent the critical factors that characterize a culture in which employees experience growth.
N—Nourished Network: The network has become the icon to the 21st century that the atom was to the 20th century. Beyond doing business on the web, the network economy is based on connecting and distributing knowledge in real-time and achieving critical mass until a network demonstrates organic behavior in a technological matrix.
I—InnovativeInvolvement capitalizes on diversity of perspectives, fostering the interaction and collision of concepts to germinate into creative ideas. Smart companies embrace six strategic elements that create a level of investment that leads to ownership and pride.
U—Understanding Customers: We have moved from the service economy into the experience economy. Creating "legendary knock-your-socks off" service is only the starting point. Understanding today’s customer requires the harnessing of technology to customize and individualize our offerings to create a unique customer experience.
M—Managing for the Future: The four forging forces that characterize the transition of the new millennium have resulted in fragmentation of markets, increased uncertainty and the vanishing of mass markets. Effective organizations have mastered this challenge and lead the way by embracing ten critical initiatives.
Many managers don't exactly know what coaching is and how it can benefit them, their employees and the company. It is essential that a manager knows the distinctions between
coaching and training, counseling and therapy.
2. Check your beliefs about people.
If your beliefs about people are that they are there just to do a job and that given any freedom, people will not work, then think again! A good coaching manager's beliefs around people are exactly the opposite in that they believe that people are great and each person has huge potential.
3. Undergo suitable training.
Coaches are not generated as a result of a one or two day or even week long course! Coaching effectively takes time and practice. Courses that offer follow up options are most effective. Always check what the course content entails, the duration of the course and the skill levels and experience of the trainer coaches.
4. Get your own coach.
The best form of follow up to any training course is to have your own coach or arrange good peer coaches. The best coaches are also the ones who have been effectively coached themselves.
Training courses alone do not produce superior coaches. Often it is helpful to have someone to assist you in bridging the gap between knowing and doing.
5. Get support from your own boss.
Some managers do not even start to coach because their boss doesn't. Some senior managers are not convinced of the benefits of coaching and if this is the case, you have to convince them that there are numerous benefits. Once they are on your side you can then start to put time aside to coach. Today many progressive organizations strive for a coaching culture.
6. Manage your team's expectations.
If you have been the traditional "do as I say" manager, and then suddenly you begin to put time aside, and to listen and question, won't that seem a bit strange to the team? Is there a hidden agenda? Be up front with them. Tell them what is going to happen and tell them the reasons why - coaching is wonderful!
7. Manage your time effectively.
Although coaching can be done in short sharp bursts, there are times when longer periods are needed to coach members of the team. This requires dedicated time, and this must be built in to the manager's schedule. Managers need to be able to put time aside for coaching and to ensure they keep that time, not let other less important tasks get in the road.
8. Know when and when not to coach.
A new manager keen to coach can sometimes try to coach a team member when that is not the intervention that is actually needed. Managers should study the use of the skill/will matrix (capability / motivation grid) to know what intervention to use at what time.
9. Get regular feedback from peers, superiors and those you are coaching.
The more quality feedback you get, the more chance you have of building your coaching skills, your credibility, and your team's results. (360 Feedback is often helpful)
10. Keep learning and developing your skills.
Don't stop learning, once you have completed your initial coaching program. Coaching is developing all the time. Keep up to date with latest developments either through your coach, or through the latest literature, coaching websites, or conferences.
1.THE CONTROL FREAK: 'That's not how I told you to do it!'
Control freaks are rarely control-minded about everything. Some are obsessed with budget issues only. Others are perfectionists who want the margins in those letters exactly one inch on each side. Still others want to know what everyone is doing every minute of the workday. Think about your own control-freak colleague, and determine what activates his controlling nature.
In a very diplomatic way, get your colleague to question his controlling tendencies. For instance, if a project is getting underway and the controlling person wants to monitor who's doing what on a minute-by-minute basis, ask a few mind-opening questions: Why do we need to keep such close track of time? What has worked best with previous projects? What will work best for this project? Let the answers speak for themselves.
People who work for control freaks often go to their boss for permission or guidance every time they want to do something that's slightly beyond their usual set of tasks. If you find yourself operating in ask-the-boss mode, you know the result: It keeps the boss happy, but it stifles your creativity, growth, and sense of mission. What to do? Make a new habit of doing things without always getting the boss's signoff. Start small. If your controlling boss tries to pull you back, simply say, 'You're so busy, I just didn't want to bother you with this.' Try again if you have to, and build on the small successes.
-- Another response to the controlling boss is 'drone mode' -- where the employee never tries anything different, opting to do the same work the same way, day in and day out, simply to keep the boss out of her hair. If you want something more, then re-engage your brain and start planning. What do you want to learn? How do you want to grow? Is there something new you could do -- or something you currently do that could be done differently and better? -- that would help you and your organization and its customers? Decide on one or two steps you can take and get going. In doing this, you might have to talk things over with your boss. Just be careful not to slip into ask-the-boss mode!
2.THE STICKLER: 'According to Rule #247...'
To the stickler, rules and policies are king. So when they cite Page 86 of the policy manual to explain why you can't do something, don't try going toe to toe with them. Certainly don't challenge the rule itself. You'll find yourself expending a lot of energy -- and getting nothing but resistance and frustration in return.
There's one exception to the don't-confront-them suggestion: Sticklers often jump to conclusions, instinctively believing that any new approach goes against the rules and policies. If your proposed way of doing things actually stays within established boundaries, take the time to explain it in detail. Clear up any misunderstandings.
If your proposed approach pushes the outside of the policy envelope, then ask for the stickler's input, perhaps with a lead-in like this: 'I hear what you're saying. Do you have any ideas on how I could go forward with this? Could the plan be tweaked in some way?' Use her response to start a constructive dialogue that focuses more on the intended outcome -- and less on the rules or policies that stand in your way.
When you're proposing something that might catch flak from a rule-driven colleague, explain it in terms of the organization's or department's mission. Show how the new way of doing things promotes the mission. Example: 'I know that support staff have never been able to access the sales data, but if our mission really is to make EVERYONE in the company a salesperson, maybe greater openness would make sense.'
3.THE MINIMIZER: 'Sorry, but that's not my job.'
The next time you approach a minimizer for help with a task that's outside his routine, let him know how his work will contribute to the big picture. For instance, if you need help assembling materials for an upcoming presentation, take five minutes on the front end to explain what the presentation is about, why it's important, and how his help will make a difference.
Minimizers rarely hear compliments, so try a little flattery. For example: 'I know you're busy, but I was wondering if you could help me with these spreadsheets. You seem to be the only one around here who knows the program.' If your comments are genuine, they'll strike a positive chord.
Pair up a minimizer with two or three other people who are quite the opposite -- industrious types who charge into new work activities. There's a risk that the minimizer will drain energy away from the group, but more likely than not, they'll feel a need to perk up and pitch in.
It's easy to conclude that minimizers are just plain lazy. In reality, many are stuck in ruts that they don't enjoy. Perhaps their home life is in turmoil and it's all they can think about. Or maybe they lack confidence and are afraid to try new things. If your rapport with them is good enough, explain how you see the situation, and ask for their impressions. Turn this into a constructive dialogue. Work together to figure out ways to make things better for everyone.
When proposing new assignments to minimizers who feel they lack the necessary skills, show your awareness and offer support, like this: 'I know you've never handled phone inquiries, and don't worry, we won't just toss you in. You can attend the special training session being held next month. And if you want, you can be teamed up with one of our veteran phone reps so you can learn all the ins-and-outs.'
4.THE PESSIMIST: 'That'll never work.'
Avoid the urge to dismiss the pessimist's negative outlook. It's tempting to counter with a simple, 'Aw, it's not that bad' -- and to turn your attention to the positive people. This is certainly an efficient approach. But it risks alienating the pessimist and making her feel even more negative. And it keeps you from getting at underlying issues and helping to change the person's attitude in the long term.
When a pessimist starts to generalize, ask why, and gently press for specifics and solutions. Pessimist: 'There's no way that plan is going to work!' You: 'Why do you say that?' Pessimist: 'It's unrealistic.' You: 'In what way?' Pessimist: 'The assumptions on which it's based are completely subjective. We don't have enough hard data.' You: 'Which assumptions in particular?' Pessimist: 'The ones about buying trends in the young-adult market over the next two years.' You: 'How could we get better data?' As you can see, it's a matter of asking questions to turn the generalizations in specifics -- and to get the person engaged in solving the problem.
As ideas and action plans begin to take shape, people often get carried away with enthusiasm -- and they fail to see potential pitfalls that can hobble the plan as it's implemented. You can guard against this by putting the pessimist to work in the important role of 'healthy skeptic.' Ask for her candid feedback while things are being put on the drawing board. Ask questions like: What are we not considering as we build this plan? What could go wrong in implementation? If the responses are general, use additional questions to uncover specifics.
When the pessimist insists that things won't work, share one or two recent success stories as evidence that it just might be possible. For instance, if the person is bemoaning the fact that a team approach will simply take too much time, share the story about the team from last year that used a 'blitz' approach to complete their project in one week.
5.THE STALLER: 'What's the big rush?!'
Ask yourself whether all that stalling is really the staller's fault. Perhaps she's juggling a hundred different demands every workday, and staying on schedule is nearly impossible. There might systemic problems entirely out of her control -- required signoffs, excessive paperwork, cumbersome rules -- that cause delays. Don't assume the worst. Take some time to learn the full situation.
If there's real stalling going, and if you can handle it for a while, let the person stall all she wants -- and let the chips fall where they may. There's something to be said for accountability and consequences.
Stallers often wreak the most havoc at the end of a project, when their work is supposed to come together and never does. Prevent this problem by having intermediate deadlines. Use them to check progress on a regular basis -- and to decide on corrective measures to get back on schedule.
Some stallers are more like perfectionists. They keep refining their work until they've stretched every last measure of flexibility out of the project schedule. When a work product can be in draft or prototype form, or whenever perfection would actually go beyond requirements, be sure to say so. Make clear that outstanding output is appreciated and definitely desired in many situations, but not this one.
Many stallers have controlling tendencies. Their delaying ways are a strategy -- though often an unconscious strategy -- of exerting control over their co-workers and managers. They can hold up a project, foul up a deadline, or make someone wait. What to do? Give them control of a positive kind. Allow them to set their own deadlines within the overall constraints of the work at hand. Have them help shape how the work is done and how the project will unfold. Bring them into the information loop so they can see how work in one area affects other areas.
If none of the above strategies seems to work, consider the fact that some people are just natural procrastinators. They enjoy doing their work with the rush of an impending (or recently passed) deadline. Perhaps there's a role in your workplace that calls for someone who can thrive in times of extreme urgency.
6.THE KNOW-IT-ALL: 'I know the solution!'
Don't be too quick to dismiss their ideas. Even though their know-it-all ways can be grating, they just might have the knowledge or information you're seeking.
When they're speaking, show respect for their know-how by being an active listener. Before moving the conversation to another question or topic, paraphrase what they've just said to show your understanding.
Make sure you have an ample supply of data and facts when engaging them in conversation. Be up to speed. Guesswork, assumptions, estimates, and hunches won't be enough to hold the know-it-all's attention, let alone to convince them of anything.
If you're seeking information from them, frame your question(s) carefully. Be specific about what you're asking. Otherwise, they might go off on tangents -- intelligent tangents, but tangents nonetheless that are frustrating and counterproductive.
If you're in a group setting with a know-it-all, and you want to get input from participants, use a round-robin process, with each person being given an equal amount of 'air time' to share their views.
Avoid directly challenging a know-it-all's facts or interpretation of the facts. Instead, pose a question that can open their thinking. Example of what NOT to say: 'Your data from last quarter can't be right.' Better: 'What are the sources of that data?' Better still: 'What do you think we can do to make sure our quarterly data is accurate and relevant?'
Don't question or criticize their credentials. Even though you might have good reason to do so -- and it might feel good in the short term -- they're likely to get angry, defensive, and even more difficult to work with in the long term.
7.THE GOSSIP: 'Got any juicy stories?'
Don't let yourself get sucked into the gossip vortex. If you're with a group and the conversation starts sounding like a public reading of the National Enquirer, politely excuse yourself and walk away.
If you're willing to take a stand against gossip in the workplace, stay with the group and do your best to change the subject. Do it subtly, though -- there's nothing to be gained by turning this into a confrontation. Here's one approach that can get the conversation back on course: 'You know, we probably shouldn't be talking about John when he's not here to give us his side of the story. When will we be seeing him next?'
Be ready to ratchet up your response if people are spreading rumors about you. You have to intervene; otherwise the stories will take on a life of their own. Approach the source of the stories in a very civil way. Mention that you've heard the stories that are going around, and ask the person where they heard them and what they believe to be true. Use the conversation to state the facts.
Ideally, try to have a few of your colleagues in on this exchange. The rumormonger is likely to backpedal, and with some co-workers on hand, it will turn into a public clarification -- perhaps even an apology.
If gossip and rumors are running rife throughout your workplace -- if they practically define the work environment -- then start analyzing why. Is internal competition pitting people against one another? Are systems in place that compel people to hoard data and resources? Is there an up-or-out culture, with people spreading rumors to keep colleagues from getting ahead? Dig deeply to uncover root causes.
8.THE SCHEMER: 'I'll help you if you'll help me.'
Schemers play people off one another, they control information, and they put their own success ahead of others'. In other words, they're game players. And they make it very tempting to play along. Think about it: If someone's keeping information from you, don't you want to hide your own precious info from them? Wanting to take them on is only natural -- and self-defeating. You'll start a battle that drains your energy, sours your colleagues, and hurts your customers. And you'll be labeled as part of the problem.
Many schemers get their way by subtly bribing people. They put on a friendly air and vaguely promise to help at some point down the road -- in exchange for an immediate favor. Their favorite phrase is 'I owe you one.' Face the fact: Schemers rarely deliver on those promises. Take a pass the next time they try to make a deal.
When a schemer turns on you, the best response is a cool head and a bounty of facts and data. For instance, if a scheming colleague is going behind your back to spread rumors that your project is way over budget, come to the next meeting with the latest figures proving otherwise. There's no need to be confrontational -- simply present the facts, take questions, and let reality clear up any misunderstandings.
If the schemer is more aggressive, actively working to sabotage your work area or project, look for an opportunity to engage him in civil conversation about it when colleagues are around -- preferably in a meeting. Explain what you are seeing and how you interpret it, and ask whether your concerns are justified. Be as specific as possible, but also be concise, and end by asking the schemer for his take on things. He'll likely be defensive, but that's to be expected. His response is fairly unimportant, actually. What you want is to create a public awareness of what's happening.
9.THE HOTHEAD: 'You people drive me crazy!'
When hotheads start to boil over, it's easy to get caught up in the moment and become a hothead in response. Don't. Stay aware of your reaction, and do your best to keep it professional. Maintain a steady voice, even breathing, and normal eye contact. In most cases, a hothead's rants are temporary. Batten down the hatches and wait for it to pass.
Many hotheads use their tantrums as a tool for getting things done. If you show that this crude tool works on you, they'll hammer you with it again and again. Stand up to the hothead while remaining as emotionally steady as possible. Make clear by your actions and words that the bullying approach won't work. After a few very trying incidents, the hothead will see the futility of her approach, at least as it applies to you.
Try to figure out what pushes your workplace hothead to the edge, and use your insights to shape your interactions with her. For instance, if she seems to blow her stack when project reports lack detail, sit down with her and get her input well before the next project is completed. Find out the precise level of detail she'd like in the eventual report. Another example: If she loses her cool whenever she feels left out of the communication loop, make a point of keeping her better informed, even if it means spending an extra 10 minutes now and then to provide briefings.
If the above ideas don't have much impact with your hotheaded colleague, communicate more in writing -- and less in face-to-face encounters. When messages are put in printed form, the person will have more time to process the information and decide on her reaction.
Recognize that some hotheads are simply hopeless. Their outbursts emerge from deep-seated issues that are beyond your control -- and are best addressed by a psychiatrist. Safeguard your own self-esteem by minimizing contact with them.
10.THE LIMELIGHT HOG: 'It's all thanks to me, myself, and I.'
Although they can get on our nerves with their constant quest for rewards and recognition, limelight hogs are rarely nasty or vindictive. You can talk to them, and often, that's the best strategy. If a project is reaching closure and you sense that your colleague might be ready to seize the spotlight, make a preemptive move by meeting with her for a private conversation. Take stock of the project and all the people who helped make it a success, and talk about ways to spread the recognition.
Set a positive example of how to share the spotlight. If you anticipate that recognition is coming your way -- and your way only -- for a project that involved a group of people, try to ensure that everyone gets the credit they deserve. If an award goes only to you, make a point of acknowledging everyone's contribution.
Document who does what as projects unfold. This can be done easily -- when compiling project updates or meeting minutes, for instance. It ensures that when the project wraps up and recognition starts going around, there's an easy way to recall all the people who are responsible.
Don't wait until the very end of a project to acknowledge people for their hard work, good ideas, and big achievements. Make acknowledgment and appreciation a routine gesture.
Take a critical look at how your workplace recognizes people. Is the spotlight narrowly focused on individuals and individual performance, or is there broader recognition of collective effort? An 'employee of the month' program might bring out the worst in your limelight hog while fomenting internal competition. Why not have a 'team of the month' or 'teams of the month'? Or how about recognizing outstanding workplace practices instead of focusing on people?
11.THE WHINER: 'Everything here is so unfair!'
Whiners have a way of drawing people into their negative vortex. Even positive people can feel the pull, especially if they want to show empathy for their complaining colleague. So be careful: When dealing with a workplace whiner, don't unwittingly become one!
Some whiners just want to vent, so give them a chance. Take five or so minutes from your schedule and let them go full blast explaining what's causing them so much heartburn. There's no need to agree with them. In fact, by agreeing, you just might fan the flames. Simply listen, ask a few questions, generate some light conversation, and leave it at that.
If the griping continues and your active listening gets you nothing but an earache, take the conversation one big step further. Ask the whiner to explain why he's complaining. Press for specifics. Try to uncover root causes. For instance, if he can't stop talking about 'unfair policies,' ask him to identify the specific policies he has in mind. Then ask him what's unfair about them. This exchange will either reveal that there's nothing behind the person's complaints -- or it will add clarity and detail to some very justified concerns.
Whiners tend to assume the worst. When any kind of change is rolled out in the workplace -- a new policy, a new project, a shift in assignments -- they jump to conclusions and broadcast their negative comments for all to hear. Facts often get ignored or distorted, and resistance to the change starts to build. The solution? Be ready with an ample supply of correct information. For instance, if you feel that someone is slamming the new sick-leave policy by twisting the facts, call in a colleague who knows the policy inside out. Have this person brief staff members, or gather the necessary information yourself and circulate it throughout the workplace.
Involve your workplace whiner in developing the very things he whines about. It sounds counterintuitive, but it's a great way to turn his plentiful energy into positive action. As an example, if a new project is being contemplated, enlist his help in determining the scope, goals, and other elements of the project charter.
12.THE HO-HUMMER: 'I couldn't care less.'
People aren't born apathetic, and few people come to work wanting to be that way. So there's probably a reason for your co-worker's couldn't-care-less attitude. Take some time to think about it, and if you can do so with utmost diplomacy, consider asking them directly. A little bit of understanding on your part will go a long way -- and might point the way to a solution.
Many ho-hummers are made that way because they're assigned to do the same work activities day after day. The solution? Try to involve them in new projects and work activities. Even a task or two away from the old routine can restart a person's pulse.
When deciding who's best-suited for a certain job or project, look beyond knowledge, skills, and abilities. Also consider people's deep interests -- the activities, pursuits, and passions that truly put a spring in their step. What about the ho-hummers in your midst? Identify their deep interests, and see if these somehow link to an upcoming project. For example, if the person is an avid writer whose job deals exclusively with numbers, look for an assignment that calls for writing skills.
Ho-hummers often feel like the workplace currents are carrying them -- that they have no control over things, so what the heck, they may as well go with the flow. Try changing the dynamic by giving them some control. Instead of telling them what to do ('Send our usual feedback survey to last month's customers'), let them figure out a better way ('How do you think we should go about getting feedback from last month's customers?').
1.Open new windows on the future by closing the doors on the past
The first step towards achieving professional excellence is to free yourself from past encumbrances. Those who excel in their personal and professional lives have successfully achieved closure on the past. You will learn how to mend the fences of fractured and fragmented relationships that are impeding your current progress. The horizons of new possibilities will no longer be obscured by the clouds of the past. You will write your own action plan for eliminating the baggage and clutter that currently holds you back.
2.Determine your destination: destination determines direction
Professional excellence is achieved by those who have a clear direction. To determine which direction to go, you must first determine your destination. You will begin to chart your own road map by discovering that here is an internal compass to point the direction. You will create your personal chart by beginning with the end in view. You will harness the technology of “Epitaph Thinking” in writing your blueprint for excellence.
3.Discover your own uniqueness; embrace and celebrate your individual reality!
Beyond “okayness,” professional excellence issues from the individualism that celebrates your unique personality and style. Resisting “templates for success,” the achiever of professional excellence accepts and affirms his or her individual personality traits. You will utilize discovery tools that will enable you to better understand yourself. You will cultivate a healthy and complete self-acceptance of your own idiosyncrasies that will enable you to move beyond saying “I’m okay” to celebrating the majesty of “you.”
4.Discover your hidden strengths and talents; affirm your positive attributes, both personal and professional.
The complement to celebrating the uniqueness of who you are is the cultivating of the core competencies of what you do best. You will discover the secret of peak performance that is linked to the identification and utilization of your best attributes, some of which may be hidden. You will begin the process of mining the richness of talents that lie within.
5.Develop conviction about your purpose in life! Become passionate about your vision!
You will learn how to live life with passion. As your personal mission statement is distilled, you will discover the power of passion. Professional excellence belongs to those who live life with passion. Learn how to link your values to your vision and how to bring a sense of conviction to your life pursuits.
6.Focus! Learn the power of saying no to lower value opportunities so that you can say yes to the higher value opportunities.
Your success in life will depend more upon the things to which you say “No” than the things to which you say “Yes.”You will learn how to employ the three D’s, the “Discernment, Discretion and Discipline” that will enable you to discriminate between those things that are worthy of pursuit and those that are not. As you master the three D’s, you will discover the power of FOCUS! Only by saying “No” to lower value situations will you find the Focus that comes from saying “Yes” to higher value challenges.
7.Master the axiom of maximum malleability: choose change as a way of life.
You will discover how to make organizational change a reality as you learn the secret of malleability. The day you stop changing you stop growing. That is the day you start dying! Learn how to shorten your fixed list and lengthen your flexible list in life! Master the challenging adventure of life on the cutting edge! Learn how to separate those things you can change from those you cannot. Learn to differentiate between flexibility, versatility and adaptability.
8.Take control of your life: separate the circle of concern from the circle of control. Choose to invest your energy in only those things that you can control.
You will learn to use the “Ledger of Life” as a daily tool to restore a sense of control to your life. You will apply the principle of relative control to reduce the stressors of life.You will conquer the negative fantasy of worry as you pinpoint it’s destructive force in your life. Self-defeating and self-sabotaging behaviors will begin to disappear as you apply this powerful principle to your life.
9.Master the secret of response-ability! The ability to respond rather than to react! The secret of self-discipline and emotional control.
Eliminate the twin tormentors of blame and shame and replace them with healthy responsibility. Then develop the secret power of “Response-Ability,” the ability to be in control in every situation in life. Employ the “A,B,C’S” of rational thinking to never again lose emotional control to external factors. No matter what happens to you in life, these principles keep you on the path to power and excellence.
10.Integrate your life for balance. Tap the power of wholeness.
Shed the segregated approach to life in the fast lane of the 21st century. Resist and rise above the dis-integrated approach that the pressures and stresses of the times create. Begin to live life powerfully, from the inside out, rather than from the outside in. You will begin to integrate the various components of your life into a beautiful balanced whole. As you tap the power of wholeness, you will more efficiently channel your energies in synchronized patterns. You will create action goals for each area of your life that will result in blend and balance.
11.Replace perfectionism with excellence: the difference between workaholism and peak performance. Commit to continuous improvement.
Excellence is based upon measurable goals; perfectionism cannot be achieved because it cannot be measured. You will identify and eliminate the self-sabotaging behaviors of procrastination, perfectionism, indecision, and fuzziness of purpose.You will utilize the principle of “penciled goals” to maintain the fluidity and flexibility that the 21st century demands. You will apply TQM principles to your personal and professional achievement plan.
12.Develop resilience; it is the foremost of the virtues. Partnered with persistence, resilience will triumphantly transcend.
Professional excellence is ultimately achieved by those who understand that there is no such thing as failure. Only where it is safe to fail is it possible to succeed. Failure is only failure when you fail to learn from its lessons. There will be setbacks, disappointments, frustrations and trials. You will learn the secrets of Persistence that enable you to keep on. Beyond persistence, you will learn the secrets of resilience: the “bounce back buoyancy” that has fueled the souls of the masters.
Choices can be overwhelming, confusing, and elusive. When you find yourself being bombarded with too many choices, divide them into two categories: Energy Inflow or Energy Outflow.
The Life Balance Scale can be a useful tool to remind ourselves to create energy, not just use it. Working from the bottom, our choices are based upon our beliefs, culture, history, instinct, values, and vision. From these we intentionally create harmony between inflow and outflow of energy.
Creating Energy Inflow is more challenging than distributing it, primarily because we tend to think that it is selfish to care for ourselves. In truth, if we do not, we eventually collapse. There are four categories to consider when creating inflow of energy:
Spiritual Growth may be experienced through people, events, scripture, the natural world, individual experience, inspiration, your inner world, society, institutions, insight, imagination, reason, speculation, relationships, emotions, order or disorder. You may approach your spiritual path through experiences that are social, solitary, practical, literal, symbolic, metaphysical, analytical, abstract, personal, immediate, systematic, and/or of-the-moment. Spirituality is not necessarily a religious expression, although it may be for some people. It could include meditation, affirmations, praying, attendance at spiritually based functions (church services, retreats, seminars, classes, trainings, meditations), or any other method you might use in the expression and expansion of your spirituality.
Physical Growth is taking care of your body and your appearance both internally and externally. It is paying attention to all bodily functions: diet, touching needs, sleep, physical activities (such as exercise, medical/dental care).
Emotional Growth is taking care of your feelings. It is your intuitive self, where you form nonintellectual, subjective responses. It is giving yourself permission to take care of yourself. It is being aware of your feelings.
Mental Growthis your thinking function used to expand knowledge and mental well-being. It is the ability to learn and reason; the capacity for knowledge and understanding. It is your left-brain linear thinking and your right-brain creative thinking combined and could include mind-stimulating activities such as reading, writing; becoming more computer literate; attending classes, seminars, workshops or other intellectual pursuits.
Balance & Boundaries In Our 24/7 World
In this age of time-saving devices such as computers, microwaves and cell phones, your life has finally become simplified, right? Well, maybe not.
In fact, what has happened with our breakthroughs in communication methods is that we no longer have an obvious place of respite. We no longer have a quiet time commuting: we have cell phones. We no longer have a quiet evening at home: we have the internet. We no longer have a leisurely time in the evening for meal preparation: we have microwaves. Our lives have changed dramatically, and unless we are very, very careful, we will glance away and find that our lives have passed us by without our active participation.
The ageless parable of the boiled frog reminds us of what can happen when we are not paying attention. If you attempt to cook a frog by throwing it into a pot of hot water, it will immediately jump out. If you knew your life was whizzing by without your being involved in directing its course, you would call a halt and take it where you want it to go. If, on the other hand you try to boil a frog by putting it into a pot of tepid water and slowly turning up the heat, your mission would be accomplished: you would have a very dead frog.
Such is also the case with your life. If you very slowly add to your commitments (read here: cell phones, e-mail, internet surfing, television, meetings, snail mail, etc.), you will eventually find that all your time is consumed. You no longer have contemplative moments. You no longer have rich relationships. You no longer accomplish the things that are truly important to you. You may indeed have it all, but you are in grave danger of losing it all.
How many broken relationships are you directly familiar with? How many families do you know where there are severe problems with children? How many executives do you know who feel hollow inside? How many situations do you observe where the main character is surging forward while not doing what he says is important to him? How often do you hear someone say she is feeling overwhelmed? This is not an accident. It is the boiling process taking us over.
That's the bad news, but happily, there is also good news. There is a solution; and one that is perhaps quite easy. It involves taking a moment for yourself and asking the question: "Is this what I truly want?" But not just a general question…you must ask yourself if the life you are leading is getting you where you want to go mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Are you losing contact with the things you value deep down? Are you maintaining the relationships you really value and creating memories you will cherish?
Or are you just collecting things (titles, objects, accolades). When you die, will you say, "I wish I had spent more time at the office" or "I wish I knew my family and friends…and myself better"? You are the only one who can answer these questions, and you MUST. Do it now. It is possible to have it all and keep it all while you go for the gold, but only if you do so intentionally.
1. Everything is connected to everything else. Real life is lived in a complex world system where all the subsystems overlap and affect each other. The common mistake is to deal with one subsystem in isolation, as if it didn't connect with anything else. This almost always backfires as other subsystems respond in unanticipated ways.
2. You can never do just one thing. This follows from the preceding idea. In addition to the immediate effect of an action, there will always be other consequences of it that ripple through the system. Every action has unintended consequences.
3. Different people in the same structure will produce similar results. Charlotte Roberts asks, "Who has the most influence on the performance of an ocean liner when it is out at sea in route to its destination?"(2) Answer: The designer of the ship. A logical extension of this notion is: Don't try to control the players, just change the rules. If the system tries to make choices for people, the people will try to outwit the system. It is much more effective to change the rules of the game so that it is to most people's advantage to make choices that are good for the whole system.
4. A collection of things is a system if any one element can affect the performance of the whole. There is no inherent end to the system. The boundaries of a system are arbitrary, defined by the observer. Systems analysis is finding connection in patterns. A threshold question in systems analysis is, "What level of the whole do you seek to know?" For example, it has been observed that business is part of a larger system constructively understood as such. For example, business decisions affect the economy, environment, community, and industry, as well as the mental health and well-being of employees and their families, and the wealth of investors.
5. From "either/or" to "both/and". We often err when we think in mutually exclusive opposites. We consider our next steps as being either along the path of solution x or solution y. Breakthroughs come when we consider the possibilities of blending both x and y. Considering both the whole and its parts, bridging in some lively way what appear to be opposites, forces us to consider situations from multiple perspectives.
6. There is no "away" to throw things to. Dennis Meadows of the University of New Hampshire said, "When you see whole systems, you start noticing where things come from and where they go. You begin to see that there is no 'away' to throw things to."
7. The easiest way out is the fastest way back in. A common blunder is to grab for a solution prematurely without appreciating the underlying root causes driving a situation. A systems thinking sequence to reach a deeper understanding is to first consider the event, then to peel back a layer to see if it is part of an underlying pattern. In other words, has this happened before? Peel another layer by asking why this pattern is occurring. Continue asking "And, why is that?" until the root cause emerges. [This is the practice of the asking the "5 whys".]
8. Profound changes can take place in ways we cannot foretell. A small force or event can have a disproportionate effect.
9. The map is not the territory. Useful as they are, no model, theory, or tool can capture the full complexity of the subject it addressees. Roger Harrison writes, "I never can resist the urge to create theories and models. But, hold all maps and theories lightly, consciously making room for mystery and for doubt."
10. An answer is a question's way of asking a new question. And, there are no final answers.
“Any student of the rise and fall of cultures cannot fail to be impressed by the role played in this historical succession by the image of the future. The rise and fall of images precedes or accompanies the rise and fall of cultures. As long as a society’s image is positive and flourishing, the flower of culture is in full bloom. Once the image begins to decay and lose its vitality, however, the culture does not long survive.” (The Image of the Future, Fred Polak, 1961)
I have been thinking about images of the future lately. I have noticed that when I complete one of my typically positive and optimistic presentations, a certain number of people will stand in line to comment. Some wish to say that they appreciate the hopeful view of the future, but a surprising number wish to say that I am wrong, that things are bad, worse than they have ever been, and getting even worse by the moment. We do not have long to last, they say.
It is not so much that I am surprised at this view, or even that within particular limited domains the view might have some validity. It is consistently surprising, rather, to notice how pleased many people are with their assessment of the future. A few are positively giddy that things are so bad.
Perhaps it is that certain types thrive on crisis. Perhaps a dour view of the general future allows the satisfaction of feeling lucky that your personal future does not look so bad. Surveys for years have demonstrated that people tend to be more optimistic about their own future than about the future in general.
What happens when a growing proportion of a society adopts a decaying view of the future? Which vision of the future is dominant in post-industrial world-around culture today?
Robert Heilbroner, in his 1995 book, Visions of the Future, outlines three historical visions of the future, which have existed successively in the Distant Past, Yesterday and Today.
By the “Distant Past” Heilbroner refers to all of human existence from the appearance of Homo Sapiens 150,000 years ago down to the emergence of “Yesterday”, approximately two or three hundred years ago. The Distant Past began with primitive societies using stone and flint tools, followed by ten to twenty thousand years during which material progress slowly accelerated with the use of copper and bronze. This was followed around the 6th millennium B.C. by a tremendous social change that itself lasted several thousand years, the emergence of the first complex and stratified societies of history, the Mesopotamian, Egyptian, Indian and Chinese kingdoms and empires. The Distant Past eventually included Greece and Rome, the Aztecs and Mayans, the Middle Ages, and finally the appearance of the modern nation-state in Europe in the 17th Century.
This Distant Past encompasses an enormous range of human societal forms and experience. It was diverse in myriad ways, except for one, “its earthly view of the future,” according to Heilbroner. From seers to oracles to priests, from rulers to commoners, the record that exists suggests that people shared one view of the future: that it would not change. They did not imagine that the material conditions of the masses of people or its rulers would change “in the slightest degree.”
This view of the future remained stable despite increasing travel and trade, and the ebb and flow of kingdoms and empires. People believed in the acceptance of things as they had always been and must henceforth always be. Varying religious systems reinforced this view, promising only reward or punishment in an afterlife.
Yesterday began about 300 years ago, and lasted until perhaps the middle of the 20th Century, says Heilbroner. With the Renaissance, the emergence of science and of theories of material progress and then machines and industry, the view of the future changed. Seemingly overnight, there emerged a vision of the future as the “carrier of previously unimaginable possibilities for improving the human condition at all levels.” In other words, hope and confidence had arrived and became dominant.
Yesterday’s image of the future was not evenly distributed around the world, in contrast to the Distant Past. In many parts of the world – Africa, parts of Asia, Latin America, parts of Europe - the material conditions remained relatively unchanged, and an unchanging image of the future remained in place.
Today covers the period beginning in the middle of the 20th Century and continuing into 2001 (remember the year that the future arrived!). In this period, the one in which most people have lived, our images of the future have come to be dominated by large and impersonal forces, namely science, economics and mass political movements. It is Heilbroner’s central thesis that these forces, seen as benign and positive Yesterday, have come to appear as “potentially or even actively malign…ominous…threatening.” Moreover, it is in the most advanced industrial and capitalistic regions of the world that the vision of the future has taken on this dark tenor. Today’s image of the future is marked by a new degree of pessimism.
The pessimism differs from Yesterday obviously, but also from the Distant Past. In the Distant Past people believed that things would not change. Today many people believe that things will change, but for the worse. As a customer commented to me one time, “I knew that things were changing, but I didn’t know it was this bad.”
It is not clear that a malign image of the future has become dominant. It is clear that, Today, the future is seen as “contestable.”
There are positive consequences of this contestability, the most important of which is a heightened vigilance against unconsidered technology, social inequality, and exploitation.
There is a cost as well. It seems to me that the cost is reflected most significantly in a drift back to the future of the Distant Past, in which a growing proportion of people adopt a future image marked by discouragement and stagnation, and ultimately hopelessness.
Contrast a dour future image, prevalent Today, with the image of a visionary who bridged Yesterday and Today, Buckminster Fuller. It was Fuller who argued that only as recently as the 1980’s had the world reached a level of technological, scientific and imaginative knowledge, as well as sufficient connectivity, that it would now be feasible to take care of all humanity on the planet at a high standard of living, ever doing more and more with less and less, and thus preserving and enhancing the environment in the process.
Such an image seems both alluring and quaint in 2005. What will be the image of the future that emerges in the 21st Century?
Lesson 1: Being responsible sometimes means pissing people off.
Good leadership involves responsibility to the welfare of the group, which means that some people will get angry at your actions and decisions. It's inevitable, if you're honorable.Trying to get everyone to like you is a sign of mediocrity: you'll avoid the tough decisions, you'll avoid confronting the people who need to be confronted, and you'll avoid offering differential rewards based on differential performance because some people might get upset. Ironically, by procrastinating on the difficult choices, by trying not to get anyone mad, and by treating everyone equally "nicely" regardless of their contributions, you'll simply ensure that the only people you'll wind up angering are the most creative and productive people in the organization.
Lesson 2:The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have stopped leading them.They have either lost confidence that you can help them or concluded that you do not care.Either case is a failure of leadership.
If this were a litmus test, the majority of CEOs would fail.One, they build so many barriers to upward communication that the very idea of someone lower in the hierarchy looking up to the leader for help is ludicrous.Two, the corporate culture they foster often defines asking for help as weakness or failure, so people cover up their gaps, and the organization suffers accordingly. Real leaders make themselves accessible and available.They show concern for the efforts and challenges faced by underlings, even as they demand high standards.Accordingly, they are more likely to create an environment where problem analysis replaces blame.
Lesson 3:Don't be buffaloed by experts and elites.Experts often possess more data than judgment.Elites can become so inbred that they produce hemophiliacs who bleed to death as soon as they are nicked by the real world.
Small companies and start-ups don't have the time for analytically detached experts.They don't have the money to subsidize lofty elites, either.The president answers the phone and drives the truck when necessary; everyone on the payroll visibly produces and contributes to bottom-line results or they're history.But as companies get bigger, they often forget who "brought them to the dance": things like all-hands involvement, egalitarianism, informality, market intimacy, daring, risk, speed, agility.Policies that emanate from ivory towers often have an adverse impact on the people out in the field who are fighting the wars or bringing in the revenues.Real leaders are vigilant, and combative, in the face of these trends.
Lesson 4:Don't be afraid to challenge the pros, even in their own backyard.
Learn from the pros, observe them, seek them out as mentors and partners. But remember that even the pros may have leveled out in terms of their learning and skills.Sometimes even the pros can become complacent and lazy.Leadership does not emerge from blind obedience to anyone.Xerox's Barry Rand was right on target when he warned his people that if you have a yes-man working for you, one of you is redundant.Good leadership encourages everyone's evolution.
Lesson 5:Never neglect details.When everyone's mind is dulled or distracted the leader must be doubly vigilant.
Strategy equals execution.All the great ideas and visions in the world are worthless if they can't be implemented rapidly and efficiently.Good leaders delegate and empower others liberally, but they pay attention to details, every day.(Think about supreme athletic coaches like Jimmy Johnson, Pat Riley and Tony La Russa).Bad ones, even those who fancy themselves as progressive "visionaries," think they're somehow "above" operational details. Paradoxically, good leaders understand something else: an obsessive routine in carrying out the details begets conformity and complacency, which in turn dulls everyone's mind.That is why even as they pay attention to details, they continually encourage people to challenge the process.They implicitly understand the sentiment of CEO leaders like Quad Graphic's Harry Quadracchi, Oticon's Lars Kolind and the late Bill McGowan of MCI, who all independently asserted that the Job of a leader is not to be the chief organizer, but the chief dis-organizer.
Lesson 6:You don't know what you can get away with until you try.
You know the expression, "it's easier to get forgiveness than permission."Well, it's true.Good leaders don't wait for official blessing to try things out.They're prudent, not reckless.But they also realize a fact of life in most organizations: if you ask enough people for permission, you'll inevitably come up against someone who believes his job is to say "no."So the moral is, don't ask.Less effective middle managers endorsed the sentiment, "If I haven't explicitly been told 'yes,' I can't do it," whereas the good ones believed, "If I haven't explicitly been told 'no,' I can."There's a world of difference between these two points of view.
Lesson 7:Keep looking below surface appearances. Don't shrink from doing so (just) because you might not like what you find.
"If it ain't broke, don't fix it" is the slogan of the complacent, the arrogant or the scared.It's an excuse for inaction, a call to non-arms.It's a mind-set that assumes (or hopes) that today's realities will continue tomorrow in a tidy, linear and predictable fashion.Pure fantasy.In this sort of culture, you won't find people who pro-actively take steps to solve problems as they emerge.Here's a little tip: don't invest in these companies.
Lesson 8:Organization doesn't really accomplish anything.Plans don't accomplish anything, either.Theories of management don't much matter.Endeavors succeed or fail because of the people involved.Only by attracting the best people will you accomplish great deeds.
In a brain-based economy, your best assets are people.We've heard this expression so often that it's become trite.But how many leaders really "walk the talk" with this stuff?Too often, people are assumed to be empty chess pieces to be moved around by grand viziers, which may explain why so many top managers immerse their calendar time in deal making, restructuring and the latest management fad.How many immerse themselves in the goal of creating an environment where the best, the brightest, the most creative are attracted, retained and, most importantly, unleashed?
Lesson9:Organization charts and fancy titles count for next to nothing.
Organization charts are frozen, anachronistic photos in a work place that ought to be as dynamic as the external environment around you.If people really followed organization charts, companies would collapse.In well-run organizations, titles are also pretty meaningless.At best, they advertise some authority, an official status conferring the ability to give orders and induce obedience.But titles mean little in terms of real power, which is the capacity to influence and inspire.Have you ever noticed that people will personally commit to certain individuals who on paper (or on the organization chart) possess little authority, but instead possess pizzazz, drive, expertise, and genuine caring for teammates and products?On the flip side, non-leaders in management may be formally anointed with all the perks and frills associated with high positions, but they have little influence on others, apart from their ability to extract minimal compliance to minimal standards.
Lesson 10:Never let your ego get so close to your position that when your position goes, your ego goes with it.
Too often, change is stifled by people who cling to familiar turfs and job descriptions.One reason that even large organizations wither is that managers won't challenge old, comfortable ways of doing things.But real leaders understand that, nowadays, every one of our jobs is becoming obsolete.The proper response is to obsolete our activities before someone else does.Effective leaders create a climate where people’s worth is determined by their willingness to learn new skills and grab new responsibilities, thus perpetually reinventing their jobs.The most important question in performance evaluation becomes not, "How well did you perform your job since the last time we met?" but, "How much did you change it?"
Lesson 11:Fit no stereotypes.Don't chase the latest management fads.The situation dictates which approach best accomplishes the team's mission.
Flitting from fad to fad creates team confusion, reduces the leader's credibility, and drains organizational coffers.Blindly following a particular fad generates rigidity in thought and action.Sometimes speed to market is more important than total quality.Sometimes an unapologetic directive is more appropriate than participatory discussion.Some situations require the leader to hover closely; others require long, loose leashes.Leaders honor their core values, but they are flexible in how they execute them.They understand that management techniques are not magic mantras but simply tools to be reached for at the right times.
Lesson 12:Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier.
The ripple effect of a leader's enthusiasm and optimism is awesome.So is the impact of cynicism and pessimism.Leaders who whine and blame engender those same behaviors among their colleagues.I am not talking about stoically accepting organizational stupidity and performance incompetence with a "what, me worry?" smile.I am talking about a gung-ho attitude that says "we can change things here, we can achieve awesome goals, we can be the best." Spare me the grim litany of the "realist," give me the unrealistic aspirations of the optimist any day.
Lesson 13:Powell's Rules for Picking People: Look for intelligence and judgment, and most critically, a capacity to anticipate, to see around corners.Also look for loyalty, integrity, a high energy drive, a balanced ego, and the drive to get things done.
How often do our recruitment and hiring processes tap into these attributes? More often than not, we ignore them in favor of length of resume, degrees and prior titles.A string of job descriptions a recruit held yesterday seem to be more important than who one is today, what they can contribute tomorrow, or how well their values mesh with those of the organization.You can train a bright, willing novice in the fundamentals of your business fairly readily, but it's a lot harder to train someone to have integrity, judgment, energy, balance, and the drive to get things done.Good leaders stack the deck in their favor right in the recruitment phase.
Lesson 14:Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through argument, debate and doubt, to offer a solution everybody can understand.
Effective leaders understand the KISS principle, Keep It Simple, Stupid.They articulate vivid, over-arching goals and values, which they use to drive daily behaviors and choices among competing alternatives.Their visions and priorities are lean and compelling, not cluttered and buzzword-laden.Their decisions are crisp and clear, not tentative and ambiguous.They convey an unwavering firmness and consistency in their actions, aligned with the picture of the future they paint.The result: clarity of purpose, credibility of leadership, and integrity in organization.
Lesson 15:Part I: Use the formula P=40 to 70, in which P stands for the probability of success and the numbers indicate the percentage of information acquired. Part II: Once the information is in the 40 to 70 range, go with your gut.
Don't take action if you have only enough information to give you less than a 40 percent chance of being right, but don't wait until you have enough facts to be 100 percent sure, because by then it is almost always too late.Today, excessive delays in the name of information-gathering breeds "analysis paralysis."Procrastination in the name of reducing risk actually increases risk.
Lesson 16:The commander in the field is always right and the rear echelon is wrong, unless proved otherwise.
Too often, the reverse defines corporate culture.This is one of the main reasons why leaders like Ken Iverson of Nucor Steel, Percy Barnevik of Asea Brown Boveri, and Richard Branson of Virgin have kept their corporate staffs to a bare-bones minimum - how about fewer than 100 central corporate staffers for global $30 billion-plus ABB?Or around 25 and 3 for multi-billion Nucor and Virgin, respectively?Shift the power and the financial accountability to the folks who are bringing in the beans, not the ones who are counting or analyzing them.
Lesson 17:Have fun in your command.Don't always run at a breakneck pace.Take leave when you've earned it: Spend time with your families. Corollary: surround yourself with people who take their work seriously, but not themselves, those who work hard and play hard.
Herb Kelleher of Southwest Air and Anita Roddick of The Body Shop would agree: seek people who have some balance in their lives, who are fun to hang out with, who like to laugh (at themselves, too) and who have some non-job priorities which they approach with the same passion that they do their work. Spare me the grim workaholic or the pompous pretentious "professional;” I'll help them find jobs with my competitor.
Lesson 18:Command is lonely
Harry Truman was right.Whether you're a CEO or the temporary head of a project team, the buck stops here.You can encourage participative management and bottom-up employee involvement, but ultimately the essence of leadership is the willingness to make the tough, unambiguous choices that will have an impact on the fate of the organization.I've seen too many non-leaders flinch from this responsibility.Even as you create an informal, open, collaborative corporate culture, prepare to be lonely. Leadership is the art of accomplishing more than the science of management says is possible.
Some people will admit to owning false teeth; others will casually confess they do not wash thoroughly behind their ears. Some people are happy to broadcast their latest implant, lift or tuck; others are quite prepared to divulge they are penniless, poor and bankrupt. Some people tell of ghastly addictions to garlic, chocolate or pasta; others will openly say - in either pounds, ounces or kilograms - exactly how much they weigh. We will all of us admit to many things, but, nowhere, ever, at any time, have I ever heard anyone admit to not having a sense of humour.
Humour is a core condition of humanness. Laughter, smiles and a happy sense of humour are our passports of entry into the human race. We each of us grow, develop and unfold through laughter, happiness and humour. The greatest wisdom schools in the world have advocated a balance of both seriousness and joy. Laughter can also be a medicine - a medicine with tangible, physical benefits as well as therapeutic emotional, mental and spiritual benefits.
"Laughter Medicine" is an umbrella term I use for exploring some of the most fundamental issues of health, happiness and wholeness, such as, the language of laughter, the art of joyful living, the therapeutic power of play, the human need to celebrate life, the pursuit of personal happiness, re-creation, and, the quest for our inner fun child.
There is now a wealth of orthodox medical research from around the world which supports the idea that, humour heals! In particular, the exciting research of Psychoneuroimmunology proves conclusively that a happy, joyful approach to life can inspire energy, vitality and health - on every level. This view is also supported by some of the more creative and imaginative schools of counseling and psychotherapy, such as, Rational-Emotive Therapy, Transactional Analysis and Existentialism. Laughter and Relaxation Have you ever asked yourself why you laugh the way you do or why you smile the way you do? Generally speaking, laughter has a two-step action on the physical body: step one, it stimulates step two, it relaxes. During laughter, the body is stimulated and exercised; after laughter, the body relaxes and calms itself. Laughter is often, therefore, a most effective method for inducing physical and mental relaxation - laughter is a medicinal relaxant.
The relaxing effects of laughter, as discovered by medical research, include, lowering muscle tension, relaxed sympathetic nervous system, better circulation and a full, deep and healthy respiration pattern. In particular, humour, merriment and mirth are acknowledged as devices for discharging surplus nervous energy. According to modern research, laughter serves as a form of "safety-valve" for the body's energies.
Laughter is often a social signal for calm, for relaxation and for confidence. There is an old English proverb that says, "Laugh to let go" - laughter really can help us to let go of the physical, emotional and mental tensions. Indeed, the therapeutic benefits of one minute of genuine laughter is thought to be equivalent to approximately forty-five minutes of deep relaxation, according to one piece of recent research. For this reason, laughter is sometimes described as a form of internal massage. Pain: "Laugh it off"! Although laughter has been advocated as the best medicine since time immemorial, it was not until the late 1970's that the medical profession began to take laughter seriously. In particular, it was the experience of one man, Norman Cousins, that really underlined the potential medicinal powers of mirth. In 1978, the New England Journal of Medicine published an article by Norman Cousins which outlined his recovery from a painful, crippling disorder known as ankylosing spondylitis - his chief medicine was regular prescriptions of Candid Camera episodes and Marx Brother movies.
In his book, Anatomy of an Illness, Norman Cousins "made the joyous discovery that ten minutes of genuine belly laughter had an anaesthetic effect that would give me at least two-hours of pain-free sleep." Norman Cousins found that laughter could help to relieve pain - probably because of its ability to relax muscles and nerves. Norman Cousins is now a professor of medicine. He has actively helped to pioneer much of the research of Psychneuroimmunology - one of the major findings of which is that laughter and happy, positive attitudes can effect a release of endorphin chemicals into the body - endorphins are our body's natural pain-killers. Smile away your Stress It was Herman Melville, author of Moby Dick, who wrote, "A laugh's the wisest, easiest answer to all that's queer." One of the inspirations for starting The Laughter Clinic was the number of people attending the NHS Stress Buster Clinics who would testify, "the turning point came when I started to laugh". It is so often true that during times of stress, laughter, smiles and humour can offer light relief and personal release.
Psychologists have posited over eighty different theories as to why we laugh. One major theory states that laughter has a profound effect on personal perception - we change the way we look at the world, when we laugh. Therefore, one reason why we laugh is to change perceptions, alter perspective and create a new view. This is so important for successful stress control because, as the old saying goes, "People are disturbed not by things, but by the view they take of them," Epictetus, 1st century, A.D.
Laughter is such a capable healer when it comes to stress - laughter can fizzle fear; laughter can help us to see the folly of our anxieties; laughter is often a wonderful release during times of mental tension; we laugh to increase our tolerance and understanding. Another major theory of laughter suggests that laughter is an act of liberation and self-superiority: as a medieval poet once penned, "laughter takes us up, way up high; from a dark bottomless pit, to the fresh, clear blue sky". Fun for Fatigue Mind, body and soul light up like a bright neon light whenever we laugh. Laughter, humour, happiness and play can all create chemical changes in the body so as to effect energy, vitality and strength - when we are laughing we are truly alive. We each have an abundant store of energy which we are occasionally denied, not because of a poor diet of food or drink or breath, but because of a poor diet of attitude, thought and belief.
Energy is first and foremost a product of mind; not of body. Laughter tends to inspire enthusiasm, fresh resolve, positive outlook and the ability to start over again. Laughter is a form of zest, and as the philosopher, Bertrand Russell, once wrote, "What hunger is in relation to food, zest is in relation to life". Laughter, happiness and joy fire the "energizer hormones", noradrenalin and cortisol, through the body, and in so doing, laughter helps us to embrace life with all of the intensity, application and enthusiasm we require.
Conclusions
For so long, the medical profession has tended to dismiss laughter as being something that merely makes people feel good. The whole point is, however, that "merely" making people feel good is an essential requirement of health, happiness and wholeness - when we well, we tend to be well. This is increasingly apparent with the advent of modern mind/body research, psychosomatic medicine and psychoneuroimmunology research.
Laughter is a medicine - it has tangible, physical effects as well as subtle, therapeutic emotional, mental and spiritual effects. The recent upsurge of medical research into mirth, merriment and laughter supports an holistic model for health that considers health to be supported and enhanced by a person's sense of happiness and wholeness. Learning to allow yourself to laugh, to smile, to play, to be joyful and to be happy are essential talents and skills that can create a more permanent foundation for well-being. Humour heals.
“I started out with nothing. I still have most of it.”
—Michael Davis on the Tonight Show
“I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What the hell good would that do?”
—Ronnie Shakes
“I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.”
—Samuel Goldwyn
“More than anytime in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly.”
—Woody Allen
“Enjoy yourself. If you can’t enjoy yourself, enjoy somebody else.”
—Jack Schaefer
“As you’re the only one you can really change, the only one who can really use all your good advice is yourself.”
—John-Roger and Peter McWilliams
“I’ve tried relaxing, but—I don’t know—I feel more comfortable tense.”
—Captions for Hamilton cartoon
“Keep your boss’s boss of your boss’s back.”
—First Law of Corporate Survival
“The trouble with the future is that it usually arrives before we’re ready for it.”
—Arnold H. Glasow
“Our problems are mostly behind us. What we have to do now is fight the solution.”
—Stult’s Situation Report
“Strangely enough, this is the past that somebody in the future is longing to go back to.”
—Ashleigh Brilliant
“Things are more like they are now than they have ever been before.”
—Dwight D. Eisenhower
“In a fight between you and the world, bet on the world.”
—Franz Kafka
“Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long.”
—Ogden Nash
“Whenever he thought about it, he felt terrible. And so, at last, he came to a fateful decision. He decided not to think about it.”
—Life 101
“Never become irritable waiting for things to get better. If you’ll be patient, you’ll find that you can wait much faster.”
—Unknown
“Every adversity carries with it the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit.”
—Napoleon Hill
“Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you have wanted had you known.”
—Garrison Keillor
“If you’ve always done it that way, it is probably wrong.”
—Charles Kettering
“Problems are the price of progress—don’t bring me anything but problems.”
—Charles Kettering
“Faced with the choice between changing one’s mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everyone gets busy on the proof.”
—John Kenneth Galbraith
“Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad.”
—Aldous Huxley
“Things will get better—despite our efforts to improve them.”
—Will Rogers
“I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don’t know.”
—Mark Twain
“The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.”
—Oscar Wilde
“Ride the horse in the direction that it is going.”
—William Erhard
“I feel so bad since you’re gone. It’s almost like having you here.”
—Anonymous
“The other day I got out my can-opener and was opening a can of worms when I thought, ‘What am I doing?’”
—Jack Handey, Deepest Thoughts from Saturday Night Live
“The reason lightning doesn’t strike twice in the same place is that the same place isn’t there the second time.”
—Willie Tyler
“If the people don’t want to come out to the ball park, nobody’s gonna stop them.”
—Yogi Berra
“You belong to a small, select group of confused people.”
—Message in fortune cookie
“You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?”
—Stephen Wright
“Half this game is 90% mental.”
—Danny Ozark, Philadelphia Phillies Manager
“If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mister Brave Man, I guess I am a coward.”
—Jack Handey, Deepest Thoughts from Saturday Night Live
“If you are losing a tug-of-war with a tiger, give him the rope before he gets to your arm. You can always buy a new rope.”
—Max Gunther
“You ought to take the bull between the teeth.”
—Samuel Goldwyn
“This life is a test; it is only a test. If it were a real life, you would receive instructions on where to go and what to do.”
—Unknown
“Sometimes I get the feeling that the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that’s not all true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.”
1. Audit Your Company Cultures Companies don't have one culture. They have as many as they have supervisors or managers. You want to build a strong culture? Hold every manager accountable for the culture that he or she builds.
2. Informed People Don't Fear Change People are not afraid of change. They fear the unknown.
3. Beware "Aspirational Accounting" Enron has changed things significantly. You used to be able to buy a company, account for it in bizarre ways, and make money on the sale. That world is over.
4. Empower Your People -- Turn Them Loose Freedom is the greatest when the ground rules are clear. Chalk out the playing field and say, Within those lines, make any decisions you need.
5. Prevent Erosion of Human Assets We are systematically depreciating our human capital. For most people, the first year with the company is the best. It's downhill from there.
6. Be Generous with What You Know Knowledge sharing is the basis of everything. Share knowledge with reckless abandon.
7. Expand Your Roster Think of your team as not just the people you pay, but as the people who pay you as well.
8. Don't Judge a Man by the Size of His Wallet The only thing wrong with poor people is that they don't have any money. That's a curable condition.
9. Harness Your Skills for Good Technology has enormous potential to facilitate public-health problem solving. Marcus Welby needs you guys.
10. Groom Your People for Success Weakness fixing might prevent failure, but strength building leads to excellence. Focus on strength, and manage around weaknesses.
11. Promote Brand Awareness throughout Your Enterprise Everybody throughout the enterprise should know what the brand can and cannot do. There's an imperative for education.
12. Embrace Imperfection -- Fast! Beware of perfect people. They will never propel your enterprise to greatness. They're too cautious. You've got to be fast to be good.
13. Don't Let the Venture Capitalists Get You Down Revolutionary change is where real value is created. Don't assume the capital markets know what the hell they're doing. The VC market is currently in more disarray than most companies.
14. Allow Yourself to Dream Dreams are maps. The ability to think about the future is what drives us all to attain.
15. Increase Your Net Worth Networking is sharing your contacts with others to create value without the expectation of compensation. Your network is your net worth.
16. Use Every Teachable Moment Every time you give somebody compensation, it's a great time to give feedback.
17. Shine Some Hope If you want to work with people who have no hope, you have to look like the solution and not the problem.
18. Set a New Standard of Performance We need to get beyond the single bottom line and measure a company's performance by a triple bottom line. Financial profits alone aren't enough. The results also need to be good for people and for the environment.
19. Laugh at Yourself Just when you think the sun shines out of your butt, all you have is an illuminated landing area.
20. Get Up, Stand Up YCDBSOYA: You can't do business sitting on your armchair.
21. Stop Whining -- Start Seeking
In these times, it's important to find the opportunities in the disruptions rather than just to lament the change.
22. Leaders: Move It or Lose It
Managers consistently delude themselves about how much good they're doing. The oath for managers should be the same as physicians: First do no harm.
23. Be Honest The same thing you want from management is what customers want from you: honest communication. Be honest with your customers; tell them everything you know.
24. Don't Stretch This Rule When you start thinking about growing your brand, be sure not to ignore the Spandex rule: Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.
25. What's Your Bottom Line? People over 65 were asked, 'If you could live your life over, what would you do differently?' They said three things: 'I'd take time to stop and ask the big questions. I'd be more courageous and take more risks in work and love. I'd try to live with purpose -- to make a difference.' You don't have to be an elder to ask, What's my own bottom line?
The companies that break away from the pack in the next economy will focus almost obsessively on customer service, says author Charles L. Fred. Deliver on your promises, and consumers will reward you handsomely. Here's how.
Charles L. Fred loves a good track-and-field metaphor. Pick up the pace. Go the distance. Break away from the pack. Lap the competition.
Once a nationally ranked NCAA track athlete, Fred sees a strong correlation between today's cautious economy and the first half of a competitive race -- before the fastest competitors pull away from the status quo. That outburst of speed and fitness is the focus of Fred's lifework as an accelerator of corporate learning.
"Corporations are naked in the press," says Fred, president and CEO of the e-learning software company Avaltus Inc. "Their stocks are devalued, their people are disgruntled, and the Feds are asking questions. Consumers don't know whom to trust, so they trust no one. Every company is being pushed back into the pack. Industries are becoming normalized. And we all need to re-earn consumers' loyalty. Really, this is an opportune time for a company to find its edge and break away from the pack."
How can a company sprint ahead of its competitors? By delivering exemplary customer service, even when its customers are few, far between, and frugal. "Consumers care more about service quality than they did during the high-flying days of the 1990s," Fred says. "They have less money to spend, they are more discriminate about what they buy, and they are less trusting."
Consumer confidence is the key to economic recovery. According to Fred, companies can no longer spur recuperation through capital and scale -- by incurring more debt to erect buildings or launch new marketing campaigns. In this service economy, companies can only break away from the pack by delivering great service. "And delivering service means delivering on promises," Fred says. "Capital doesn't deliver on promises. Scale doesn't deliver on promises. It's the people in your business who deliver on your promises."
Obvious, right? Perhaps. But if the link between service and profits is so plain, why are so many consumers receiving such lousy service on so many fronts? Why isn't four-star service an industry standard in every industry? Why aren't more people smiling?
The disconnect is happening in the classroom, Fred says. Too often, employee training is an obligatory line on the corporate budget -- a gobbler of time and money that remains intact thanks to guilt and tradition. No manager wants to be the first one to cut training. At the same time, few people are willing to reassess its effectiveness and overhaul the system to teach great methods in customer service.
"We've improved every aspect of business in the past 20 years," Fred says. "We've dumped them out, reengineered them, and reduced their cycle times, but we still run with old, outdated operational-process assumptions for training. It's not a training issue; it's an operational-process issue."
In Breakaway, Fred asks why most training programs fail to support the bottom-line goal of great customer service. How can companies dedicate 3% to 5% of their net revenue to training and still fail to meet the most basic consumer demands? The problem, he finds, begins in the design phase.
Rule One: Before any training begins, company leaders should establish what Fred calls a "proficiency threshold," his first rule for effective corporate training. In other words, companies should outline the exact training needed for employees to convert knowledge into value for the customer. Leaders should set proficiency goals for departments and then explain how corporate training will help each department achieve those objectives.
"If you want to create a bigger gap of anxiety with your employees, send them to some training course that has nothing to do with their job," he says. "Anyone who's halfway decent at their job will question what in the world they are doing there."
Rule two: Accelerate the accumulation of experience. Fred says most companies devote a disproportionate amount of time and money to classroom teaching -- the introduction, assimilation, and translation of information during a three- or five-day seminar. Most employers miss or ignore the most crucial stage of learning: helping people gain hands-on experience with the theories and techniques introduced during those training sessions.
"Training events are usually fine, but all that learning is totally left to chance when employees leave; there is no follow-up," Fred says. "Companies that want to deliver on promises should work on the delivery, practice, and accumulation of experience rather than on the training event itself."
Establish trial-and-error regiments for your employees, and you will enjoy increased efficiency and profits, he says.
Rule three: But don't neglect rule three: Measure the time it takes employees to master their learning. In Breakaway, Fred explains how to calculate a proficiency rate and how to map a proficiency curve that compares the number of service units required to reach the proficiency threshold, where the organization can deliver on its value proposition.
By keeping close tabs on employees' cycle time to proficiency, a company can help its people learn more skills faster over time. And speed is still important. Fred says speed is, in fact, now equal to quality in its value to customers. Still, trust remains paramount.
"The absolute unilateral focus must be delivering on promises," Fred says. "The companies that break away will have a pure external focus on the customer. They will think about gaining new customers, keeping the ones they have, and coming up with new ways to wow the customer. The ones that immediately look internally for problems will find behind. They will be laying people off, blaming employees, and firing their CEO. They will be so internally focused that they won't be able to see who the customer is anymore."
Sidebar: Six Ways to Help Your People Learn -- Fast!
Charles L. Fred interviewed roughly 300 CEOs, technical leaders, training managers, and entry-level employees while working on Breakaway: Deliver Value to Your Customers -- Fast. The most successful companies he studied followed the three rules for corporate training outlined above, but some lackluster companies did too. Why the inconsistency?
True breakaway companies also exhibited some special, enigmatic qualities, or "mojo," Fred says. Here, he describes the six themes common to organizations that learn fast.
1. Make proficiency an organizational priority.
"Workforce efficiency is not a departmental issue or an HR issue; it's a board-level issue. Every time Starbucks looks to open a new store or a new market, the company leadership asks, How quickly can we get those new people to deliver the company's culture and values? Home Depot and Australia's WestPac Bank do this very well too. They make workforce proficiency an agenda issue at the board level. They make it a leadership priority."
2. Be impatient with wasted activity.
"Few of the successful companies that I studied had large training budgets. They didn't set aside 5% to 7% of revenue for training. They didn't have fancy solutions. They had creative, innovative training strategies that worked because their people cared. If you have no money, chances are you'll devise simple, effective ways to train your employees. If you have a large training budget, you'll probably have a lot of waste.
“WalMart is a great example of a big company that, I swear, has no training budget, yet its whole team is always ready to roll. Wal-Mart has no patience for a system that takes eight months to implement. It hasn't overengineered the learning process. It knows that people with the right drive and motivation will get up to speed in time, even without a corporate university or a chief learning officer."
3. View employees as consumers of learning.
"The typical assumption is that educators should know how everyone learns best. The best companies understand that their employees know themselves best. They let their people choose the delivery method best suited for the way they learn. They don't homogenize their people."
4. Stress simplicity.
"The learning processes in the best companies were so simple -- it was almost scary. Most of the money was spent running practice sessions, like simulated call centers, and helping employees acquire experience. The training itself was purposely simple so that the companies could change it fast, if a new tool or piece of information arrived on the scene. If training gets complex, they get rid of it."
5. Innovate to learn.
"Fast companies often have training methods that look goofy from the outside but that deliver raw innovation and really help their people get up to speed fast. They are so driven to deliver faster than their competition that innovation has to happen. They can't afford to wait around for typical training programs to take hold, so they launch grassroots efforts that strike a real chord with people."
6. Cultivate candor.
"The companies that moved the quickest were brutally honest about training. They examined every institutionalized process that made no sense. They questioned everything. They didn't protect the status quo; they exposed it."
This title from Dr. Robert H. Schuller’s best-selling book is as relevant today as it was when he first published it more than twenty-five years ago. The current economic downturn has resulted in the jobless rate soaring into the millions in North America and hundreds of thousands of people forced to face harsh economic realities as they have seen their life savings evaporate in a matter of months. Unable to meet their mortgage payments and minimum monthly obligations, many thousands of families have been forced out of their homes while others are hanging on by a thread. While economic pundits and political leaders dish out daily prescriptions for recovery, the average individual is faced with the challenge of surviving a downturn that has devastated their dreams of security, let alone retirement. Hype is no substitute for hope, and while there is more than enough blame to go around, affixing blame doesn’t fix the problem.
Where do you turn and what do you do when faced with the uncertainties of today’s reality? How can you survive the current crisis and prepare for the future? These questions are paramount in the minds of so many...and their answers seem evasive. There is little comfort in knowing that our parents or grandparents went through similar economic crises in the past and survived. This is a different time. You face your own unique pressures and challenges. Are there any answers? Is there a practical solution within your reach?
While I don’t pretend to offer any guaranteed solution or a fail-proof formula, I have drawn from my own experience in the ideas that follow a fundamental game plan that can help you to ASCEND, to rise above the turbulence and tumult of today’s uncertain times. In the construct of the acrostic ASCEND, which stands for Accept, Simplify, Clarify, Explore, Nurture and Discipline, are six core and critical steps that you can take to rise above the downturn.
Accept Responsibility for Your Present and your Future
Accept responsibility for your present and your future. The natural tendency when you have lost your job, seen your investments devalued, or face setbacks in your finance, career, personal or professional life, is to point the finger of blame at those you deem responsible for your plight. While this is a natural human response mechanism, it is non-productive.
Fixing blame, fixating on the past, focusing on what “could have been, should have been, would have been, or might have been” is a colossal waste of energy. Blaming the government, the economy, the employer, the market, the Wall-Street sharks, the actions of others, etc., forces you to retreat both mentally and emotionally into the past. As a wise friend once said to me, “There is no future in the past.”
Take ownership of your current reality. The first step is to “own” that you are where you are today because of choices you have made. You will be empowered to prepare for the future when you embrace the reality of your present situation.
In my work as an executive coach, I am often face-to-face with people who have been removed from positions of significant influence and power. In many cases their removal has come about because of their own behaviours or actions. In other cases, they are legitimately the victims of the actions of others. However, in either case, the necessary first step towards recovery that I look for is when the person realizes and honestly states, “I am where I am today because of choices that I made.” This is as true for the individual who finds themselves in an unfulfilling marriage as it is for the person who has been fired from their job.
Assuming responsibility for the current reality is empowering because it enables one to no longer look externally, to focus on other people or events, but to take ownership and seize the initiative that paves the way for the future. Responsibility is actually response-ability. It is the “ability to respond” rather than to react. It is forward and future-focused, as opposed to pulling one back into the past.
Blame, whether targeted towards others or invoked internally, is destructive. Blame and shame travel together when internalized. When blame is externalized, anger and hostility toward others often attend it, while the seething cauldron of internal resentment saps away one’s very life. Only by accepting responsibility for today and tomorrow can you avoid the seductive sabotage of the insidious psychological poison of blame.
Twenty years ago, I went through a period of great loss. After building a successful business in the financial services sector, I experienced the loss of a significant lifetime income. In my panic, I accepted a position that brought me from the west coast to the east coast, and worked for many months, receiving payment in “shares” that proved to be worthless. It was only when the sheriff showed up to evict me from the corporate condo that I woke up the reality that the business relationship and venture with a “trusted friend” was nothing more than an empty promise.
I licked my wounds for awhile, went from the “pity pot” to the “pity party” expending my mental energy on “blaming” those that I deemed responsible for my plight. Then one morning I woke up and realized that none of the parties that I blamed for my situation were likely to be thinking about me that day...and that my “backward” focus would not enable me to move into the future. I discovered what it really meant to accept responsibility for today...and for tomorrow.
Simplify and Streamline Your Life and Seed for the Future
Simplify and streamline your present lifestyle to minimize your commitments. In times of abundance and prosperity we tend to surround ourselves with “stuff.” We are bombarded by the media, feel peer pressure from social groups, and seem compelled to have to have the latest technology, most current fashions, and accumulate “stuff” that we don’t really need. Many people leverage their credit for such acquisitions, and are barely able to meet their minimum monthly payments. Someone once said that “if your outgo exceeds your income, your upkeep will be your downfall.”
The trap of “trappings” is highly seductive in a secular society, and those who succumb to its lure find themselves surrounded with unnecessary possessions that have long since lost their luster, while struggling to meet the payment schedule that they signed onto in better times. Take steps to determine the “nice-to-haves” vs. the “need-to-haves” in your life, and eliminate the clutter of the unnecessary. Strip way the superfluous, reduce your overhead, and simplify your life.
By taking this step, you are afforded an opportunity as well to plant seeds for your future. When you are hard-pressed financially, the ability to give money to charitable causes is dramatically reduced. Therefore, it is unreasonable to expect any economic harvest if you haven’t planted the seed. When you don’t have the substance to support charitable causes with your finance, you can still give away from your “stuff” and by so doing, plant seeds that will bring a harvest to you.
For those who don’t have “stuff” that they can give away, there still remains the opportunity to give of time, talent and service to others. Many charitable organizations are starving for volunteer workers, and would gladly accept your offer to serve them in some way. Charities that are dedicated to providing transportation to the elderly and infirm need drivers. Those that feed the hungry and homeless need servers. Single parents on low incomes or welfare need childcare. The opportunities to seed your future by giving are legion.
Simplifying your life might also mean closing doors on your past that tend to drain you of emotional, psychological and physical energy. As you think about your past, are there broken relationships, friendships that have been fractured or fragmented, where you have yet to achieve closure? Where there are, if you don’t think about those individuals consciously, they remain in your subconscious and show up in your “dream life” at night. Who is there whose forgiveness you need to seek? Who is there whom you need to forgive? The granting and seeking of forgiveness as an act of closure is incredibly empowering. By doing this, you will simplify your life and clarify your focus for the future.
Clarify Your Purpose and Your Passion
Clarify your purpose and your passion. Many people go through life on “cruise-control” without ever having defined their real purpose. If you don’t have a destination, you will have no sense of direction. Often purpose is referred to as “mission” and much attention is given in today’s vast array of self-help literature to establishing goals in various areas of life. Goals are not magical, but they are powerful. They create what one author referred to as a “true-north” on your internal compass. They provide you with a sense of direction that enables you to do course-correction when you sense that you are off track.
Purpose, however, is bigger than goals. If goals furnish a “magnetic pull” towards your destination, purpose is the “north pole” to which your goals align. Purpose answers the bigger question of “Why am I here on this planet?” and “What is the reason for my existence?” If you are a Christian believer, this is easily answered...at least in theory. Augustine captured it well, as distilled in the shorter Westminster catechism, that, “Man’s chief end is to glorify God...”
No one was more surprised than Rick Warren himself that his book, “The Purpose Driven Life” would soar to become a best seller, and result in his multiple appearances on Larry King, hosting a presidential debate, and offering an invocational prayer at the president’s inauguration. Warren cuts through the jargon of self-help hype to clarify in concrete terms the true purpose for human existence. God did not design us for happiness, but for His glory. Interestingly, it is only when we align with His purpose that we will experience His joy, a quality that eclipses happiness, as a byproduct of that alignment.
During times of prosperity and plenty, it is easy to forget about our larger purpose in life. In the busyness of life we may not take the time to stop and ask, “What on earth am I doing for heaven’s sake?”
Clarify your real life purpose and make certain that it is in alignment with the great commandment: to love God and love others. Take inventory of your goals, objectives, and priorities and bring them into alignment with God’s purpose for your life.
Having clarified your purpose at a macro level, now seek to clarify it at the micro level. As a steward of the gifts, talents, skills and abilities that you have, seek to invest and deploy them where they will yield the greatest results...and don’t just measure those results in monetary terms. There are values that transcend monetary value. What is it that you truly value in life? Are your activities in alignment with those values?
Several years ago I terminated an employment contract that provided my basic bread and butter because I could no longer represent the organization with integrity. The organization was not involved in anything illegal, or immoral. In fact, their business was in alignment with my mission and purpose in life. However, some of their internal practices were out of synch with my own values. After terminating the contract, I looked at a blank calendar, not knowing where my income would come from the following year. At the same time, I made a commitment to myself and to God to mentor without charge the first two people that asked me to do so. Within a couple of weeks, two individuals approached me and asked if I would mentor them. When they asked what my fees would be, they were both shocked to hear me say, “Nothing.” For one individual this was good news, since he didn’t have the financial means to pay me. For the second this was unacceptable, and he insisted on paying for my time and counsel. An interesting side note to the story is that over the next year my income doubled from the previous year, and doubled again the following year.
To clarify your purpose at a micro level, determine what your real passion is. The old saw, “Do what you love and the money will follow” is tried, tested and true. If you didn’t need to earn an income, what would love to do? Of all the jobs you’ve had in the past, which were most enjoyable? Of all the tasks and activities you’ve done in your work life, which did you enjoy most?
When you clarify your passion, you’ll easily align with your purpose. Christian believers often struggle with “knowing the will of God,” as if the “will of God” for their lives is something weird, mysterious, and (in all probability) polar opposite to their own desires. In reality, God’s purpose for your life is encoded in your DNA: your gifts, talents, skills and abilities. The Holy Spirit’s indwelling presence not only enhances those natural talents, and superimposes them with an infusion of divine energy, but may also eclipse them with capacities that are not necessarily innate. In either case, it is the combination of your “total talent” DNA that defines your specific purpose, and when you working in the “sweet spot” of your “passion place” you will discover your purpose, and be in alignment with God’s purpose for your life.
When you’ve identified your passion and purpose, determine who might value the services that derive from your passion. Find a way to develop these and market them to others. What can you do that you love doing that others will pay you to do? What have you always wanted to do but never had time or opportunity to pursue? If you do what you love, you will do it with excellence, and others somewhere will value what you do. Find a way to turn your passion into livelihood.
Explore and Expand Your Opportunities
Explore and expand your opportunities. Some might make the quantum leap from what we’ve just described to believing that once you’ve aligned your purpose and passion, that people will beat a path to your door, and that your phone will start ringing off the wall. This is not the case! The onus is upon you to explore every opportunity that presents itself, and to pound the pavement if necessary, and to knock on doors until you find one that’s open.
In much of our industrialized and unionized workplaces, people quickly develop a sense of entitlement, and believe that the employer owes them because they “gave twenty years to that job.” This legacy of yesterday’s work world is no longer today’s reality. Loyalty is its own reward. Corporations don’t owe employees a future. This mentality transfers responsibility from the individual to an external source and renders them powerless in their careers and impotent in life. Now, more than ever, people need to hearken to the message that has been heralded for at least two decades by leaders in the entrepreneurial world of business, that ownership for career and professional development belongs to the individual employee and not the employer.
From recent studies that I’ve pursued around innovation and creativity, it is patently clear that “building a better mousetrap” does not guarantee success. Innovators have to promote and push their product into what is often a crowded marketplace over-populated with competitors, all of whom are vying for the same coveted dollar.
Similarly, it is incumbent on you to vigorously and rigorously pursue every opportunity that presents itself. You might have to “do what you love” for free a few times before someone puts a value on it and is willing to pay for your services. You will undoubtedly have to do things you find distasteful while pursuing a path for your passion. Take a job that you believe you’re overqualified for and become a servant to others wherever you can. If you can’t find “work” consider job-hunting as a full-time job, and pursue any and every opportunity relentlessly. Knock on doors until your knuckle are sore and bleeding...then change hands. Beat the pavement until you have holes in your soles...then change shoes.
If my statements above seem callous or harsh...they are not. They come from a place of experience. And I’ve had to do it more than once in my life. I know what it is to send out hundreds of resumes, to receive countless rejections, to knock on doors and be turned away.
Nurture Your Network of Relationships
Nurture your network of relationships. If you know of someone who could use your help but can’t afford to hire you right now, offer to volunteer your services for a few hours a week. Explore your current network and look for ways to expand it. Chances are your network is much vaster than you might at first realize. Think of the various social groups, church groups, parachurch groups, professional associations, and family networks where you have connections. Sit down and write out every relationship that comes to mind and begin to construct a map of those relationships. As other names come to mind, jot them down. Who do you know from past work experiences, places where you do business, where you are a customer, customers you have served in previous jobs? Where have you planted seeds of kindness in the past? For whom have you done favours? Who have you met where you felt a connection?
Over the years I’ve discovered that there are some individuals that I only hear from when they need something. Yet, I’m still pleased to hear from them when they contact me. Strategically, that is for the long haul, purpose not to be that kind of person. Make sure that you cultivate and nurture relationships when you don’t need the assistance of the individual. Value them for their sake. Give them of your time. That way, should you ever need to call upon them, they will be predisposed to want to assist you in any way possible. However, make sure that you don’t cultivate relationships with people just because you might need them in the future.
For the short term, don’t allow the fact that you have neglected to nurture a relationship to prevent you from re-connecting. Contact people you’ve not heard from or talked to in some time. If you’ve been remiss in not maintaining communication, acknowledge that and ask for forgiveness. Someone you know may know someone who knows of an opportunity where you will be the perfect fit. Follow up on contacts you’ve made in recent years. You never know when and where an opportunity might surface.
Discipline Yourself with Dedication, Determination, and Drive
Discipline yourself with dedication, determination, and drive to persistently and patiently persevere in your journey in spite of the discouragements that you will encounter along the way. Throughout your entire process, you will find some of the obstacles you face to be daunting. You will battle internal resistance to accepting responsibility for your past and your future. You may reluctantly give up the need to “blame others” and find yourself continuously pulled back into the past when memories are still fresh or when situations arise that resurrect past injuries. The battle of the will is one of the toughest that you will ever face. But you must stay with it. One of my closest friends loves to quote his grandfather who once told him as a little boy, “The difference between doing it and not doing it is doing it!”
As you seek to streamline and simplify your life, it will take sheer determination to give up comforts to which you have become accustomed when you decide that they are “nice to have” and not really “need to have.” When you begin to give to others, even out of your need, your generosity may not be met with appreciation.
As you seek to clarify your purpose and your passion, it may seem obscure at first, and a difficult process, especially when you are feeling the pressures the economic realities of your daily life. You have to stick with it.
When you begin to explore opportunities and knock on doors, you will have some of them slam in your face. Keep knocking.
As you invest time and energy in nurturing your network by contacting people you’ve met or haven’t heard from in some time, be prepared for disappointment. Some will dismiss you, and others will not “remember you.” But keep doing it.
During this process, you will develop one of the greatest character strengths that will define who you are: resilience. Persistence is a behaviour; resilience is a quality of character. But just as “tribulation produces patience”, so “persistence creates resilience.”
Resilience is that quality that enables one to be knocked down without being knocked out. It is the ability to get back up and start again. It is a quality that I learned from my father.
With only a grade six education, job opportunities for my father were limited. He worked in the woods, construction sites, or whatever he could find to do. This provided a living for his small family until he experienced an accident that severely limited his physical ability. While working on a construction site, he fell thirty feet from a staging onto a rock pile, breaking his back in several places. Without appropriate medical care, his back never healed properly. And with no worker’s compensation or healthcare, he found himself unemployed, unemployable, and with no means to support his wife and four small children.
His mother sent him second-hand clothes in the mail that she had washed and ironed. He took them door-to-door and sold them. With a pocketful of change, he hitchhiked into the city and purchased hairnets and bobby-pins, which he in turn peddled door-to-door. My dad became a peddler...hauling his goods on a bobsled in the winter, and from a bicycle in the summer. Eventually, he bought a second-hand car, purchased his merchandise from a wholesaler, and sold his goods door-to-door. After many years as a peddler, he opened a storefront...and when he passed away was able to leave my mother comfortable for the remainder of her days. I saw him labour in excruciating pain, often threatened by bankruptcy in his business, frequently discouraged...but always resilient. And, through all of this, he trusted God and generously supported his local church and other Christian ministries.
It almost seems gratuitous to end this with the words, “Pray and trust God.” Those two principles underlie, undergird and overarch everything that we’ve said before. When I say “trust God” I’m not speaking of the genre of intense faith that is often described as “laying hold of the horns of the altar” or wrestling something from the hand of God. Don’t fret about the amount of your faith, whether it is little or great. Don’t dwell on the strength of your faith, whether it is weak or strong. Don’t fixate on the quality of your faith...instead rest on the integrity of a Father God, whose child you are, and who cares more about you than you can ever fathom.
Trust, unlike the kind of faith so often celebrated today, is an absolute confidence in the integrity and provision of a Father God. Refuse to succumb to the fears that attend your current situation, and know that God is your Father and that He will provide.
Hard times call for hardiness. But hard times also create hardiness. You can ASCEND in a downturn. Accept responsibility for today and tomorrow, simplify your life, clarify your purpose and passion, explore every opportunity, nurture your relationships, and discipline yourself with total dedication. If you do these things, you will ascend.
